Stalker of a Smile
He watched, hiding in the shadows as he saw her get out of the car. There were others around her: a short, bald, man with a lazy eye, another whose acne-ridden face and glasses seemed to make him look more feminine then a man. Yet, he did not notice them; his eyes were fixed on her, on her smile that whispered of her inner intelligence and beauty.
Yes, that smile is what he saw; everything else could burn for all he cared. Her smile was what he wanted. He had seen it some months before while he had stumbled into the park on a Sunday night, swaggering in his drunkenness, a bottle of rum cleverly concealed in a paper bag. Life had seemed to be an endless drudgery, and he had decided that a bottle of pills and alcohol would end it all. Yet, when he stood in the darkness, struggling with the childproof cap, he saw that smile for the first time. It was a simple smile, one that was not given to him. A witty remark by a lumbering giant with a stupefied face had been the cause of it. But, when he saw it, it seemed that a light shone through the darkness of his soul, piercing his every being. It was then, on that night, that he swore to himself that he would live to see that smile again.
Now he did not consider himself a romantic man. No, the word “romantic” seemed vulgar to him in the very least. He rather fancied this was something more, something deeper then any mere romance could contrive. He did not know what he felt for her; he didn’t even know her name. Nevertheless, he knew one thing… he had fallen in love with that smile.
Night after night, he would come to the park, after the darkness had fully cloaked the earth. He would wait to see her, lurking behind trees by in the darkened, un-walked pathways, incognito. He didn’t want her to see him; he didn’t want any of them to see him. Nobody would have understood even if he had told them of his innocent intents. He didn’t want to scare her away.
For a full week, night after night, he watched and he began to study her habits. She and many of her friends would come to same park every Sunday night and games of basketball would ensue. There were many pathways in the park; dark and unobserved pathways; pathways in which he could lurk and watch her, all the while remaining unseen. She would not come some weekends, however, and oh! The pain it brought him.
He would feel the full weight of his life crashing back down on him and wail with an unending torment, beating his chest all the while in anguish and despair. Terror and the devils of drink would once again overtake him, and he would throw himself fully into his languishment and depression for the rest of the week, weeping all the while wondering why she didn’t come. Only the sight of her smile the next Sunday night would be able to pull him from the pits of his despair.
He did not know why her smile made him feel this way. It wasn’t even a smile that was smiled for him. Before he had been a melancholy man, a dangerous and angry man, filled with the spite of his advanced years. Children would run from him when they saw him in the park for his appearance and countenance were that of one most haggard. He had not always been this way though, his wife and two children were murdered before his eyes, and he had taken up to drinking in attempts to wash his sorrows away. For nearly eight years he drank rum more then he would water, and his moods became more and more dangerous with each bottle he drank. When he had seen that smile for the first time though, he had tried to stop drinking. Only when she did not come on Sundays did he revert to his old habits again. Somehow, when he was drunk, he could nearly picture that smile in his head… it was a thought that would delight him immensely.
Tonight was a special night though; tonight marked an anniversary of sorts, a landmark in his history of watching her. For, it was on this very day six months ago, that he had seen her smile for the first time. The very same smile that now punctured into his soul like a cold knife, cutting out the pain from his heart; that smile for which he lived for.
Sometimes, alone in his watching of her, he would fancy that the smile was smiled for him. With every fantasy that entered his mind his feelings of passion would rise up with great swells of grandeur. Oh the ecstasy, oh the pure joy which that though would bring him! Every time he thought of it, utter happiness would well up throughout his entire being, causing him to laugh as if he had never laughed before. Yet, deep inside, remorse filled him when he fancied these things, for he knew that she would never smile for him. Though the thought of it always ate away at his mind, torturing him greatly when he thought of it, tonight he did not care. Tonight he saw her as he had never seen her before. Tonight he saw that smile; that very same smile flash before him, and everything seemed pure again.
The games wore on into the night, yet she never played. It was not her way to play ball with her friends and she would remain perfectly content to watch, or to stroll around the court engaged in conversations. There were deep hedges of trees surrounding the court, the lights hardly piercing through their entangled branches. It was inside one of these hedges, on the far side of the court, where he stood: his hands in his pockets, his eyes set with a greedy desire upon her. Nearby, a little pathway led out into the parking lot and a set of nearby water fountains.
Presently, she stopped circling the court and, alone, she headed towards the water fountains. A cold shudder swept over him as she passed nearby, the breeze of her body sending chills down his spine and into his very soul. A voice within beckoned him to follow her. There were many dark pathways where he could lurk, and not be seen at all. Looking cautiously to make sure no one was watching, he slipped out from among the trees and, with soft steps began to follow her.
A strange sense of delight crept into his mind as he followed, slipping from tree to tree, and path-to-path in his secrecy. It was almost was a game he played: to stalk her when she left the court. Somehow, it made him feel almost brave; here he was following her, watching her while she never knew he did. Giddiness filled his head, and chucking as fantasies of her smile entered his mind he let his eyes wander from her and towards the playground that stood by the fountains.
Then, with a gasp, he let out a cry, recoiling even further into the darkness of the pathway. There, behind the set of swings, sat two hunched figures; their eyes set upon her as well. Yet, he could tell, their eyes were not set upon her smile… no, their eyes were set upon her flesh.
Terror gripped his heart, like an iron-fisted hand, twisting his soul freely as marinate strings. He knew what their desire was and he dreaded the mere thought of it. Fear flooded his heart with every step she took closer to her fate. Should he cry out to warn her? No, he could not; his presence would be heard and she would become afraid. In her fear, she would never set foot in the park again, and oh! How that thought tormented him, cut into him more then any thought of what would happen now ever could.
There was only one thought within his mind… but dared he to do it? Indignation, the hot war-fires of the soul, burned deep within his bowels. How dare those two men come here and mean to destroy what beauty he wished to have found in life? How dare they come with such vile intentions which, were they to be carried out, would cause her never to smile again. Indignation turned to anger, anger to bitter wrath and, with a great cry, he leapt forward from his hiding a bitter hatred burning within his eyes. His eyes were not set upon her but upon those two, those wicked two that had now stood ready to do their deed.
They sat their stupefied, watching while, with every passing moment, he came closer and closer to where they stood, his fingers clenched into fists of rage. She stood there too, equally as stupefied. She had not seen the two men that had stood in shadows, ready to rape her, and yet, this stranger was charging towards them in an attempt to protect her. Mouth held open, to shocked and afraid to scream, she watched as he neared them.
Then a shot rang out, and a splash of blood flew from him. One of the two had lifted a gun and shot at him, now a hole lay in his side as he bled upon the ground. The two were nowhere to be seen; they had fled into the darkness of the night, dropping the weapon in their haste.
Slowly, shaking, she went over towards his side, a look of fear covering her face. Yet when she saw him; his mangled body, and the splatters of blood on his face; she understood and her face changed from one of fear to that of pity. He noticed, and though pain coursed though his veins, he tried to laugh. By now, her friends had come to her side and someone had tried to call 991 but he knew inside that it wouldn’t matter. He had lost too much blood already and what would he did not know if he wanted to live? If he did, would he then be content to live knowing he’d never see her again, knowing that he would never she her face, her smile?
No, that pain would be too much for to bear, the mere thought of it sent a new fear into him: one that started at his stomach and crept over him as the shadow of death. He knew that he would not want to live if the ambulance were to come… life would then seem like death to him.Slowly, he shut his eyes for a moment and, smiling, he opened them to gaze into hers; those two eyes that pierced with a haunting kiss into his soul. She understood and, with a shrug, she let a little smile form upon her lips. Happiness, greater then bliss itself, flooded over him, washing away every fear that he had ever felt within his life. The far off sirens of the ambulance were heard, coming closer with their mournful wail but it did not matter to him, life now felt complete. With a sigh, he shut his eyes and let life drain from him. Darkness, thick and oppressing, filled his mind as he slipped from all consciousness. Yet, in the darkness, he still saw those two lips formed into that smile. Inside he knew that smile, that one perfect, angelic smile, was truly made for him.
Yes, that smile is what he saw; everything else could burn for all he cared. Her smile was what he wanted. He had seen it some months before while he had stumbled into the park on a Sunday night, swaggering in his drunkenness, a bottle of rum cleverly concealed in a paper bag. Life had seemed to be an endless drudgery, and he had decided that a bottle of pills and alcohol would end it all. Yet, when he stood in the darkness, struggling with the childproof cap, he saw that smile for the first time. It was a simple smile, one that was not given to him. A witty remark by a lumbering giant with a stupefied face had been the cause of it. But, when he saw it, it seemed that a light shone through the darkness of his soul, piercing his every being. It was then, on that night, that he swore to himself that he would live to see that smile again.
Now he did not consider himself a romantic man. No, the word “romantic” seemed vulgar to him in the very least. He rather fancied this was something more, something deeper then any mere romance could contrive. He did not know what he felt for her; he didn’t even know her name. Nevertheless, he knew one thing… he had fallen in love with that smile.
Night after night, he would come to the park, after the darkness had fully cloaked the earth. He would wait to see her, lurking behind trees by in the darkened, un-walked pathways, incognito. He didn’t want her to see him; he didn’t want any of them to see him. Nobody would have understood even if he had told them of his innocent intents. He didn’t want to scare her away.
For a full week, night after night, he watched and he began to study her habits. She and many of her friends would come to same park every Sunday night and games of basketball would ensue. There were many pathways in the park; dark and unobserved pathways; pathways in which he could lurk and watch her, all the while remaining unseen. She would not come some weekends, however, and oh! The pain it brought him.
He would feel the full weight of his life crashing back down on him and wail with an unending torment, beating his chest all the while in anguish and despair. Terror and the devils of drink would once again overtake him, and he would throw himself fully into his languishment and depression for the rest of the week, weeping all the while wondering why she didn’t come. Only the sight of her smile the next Sunday night would be able to pull him from the pits of his despair.
He did not know why her smile made him feel this way. It wasn’t even a smile that was smiled for him. Before he had been a melancholy man, a dangerous and angry man, filled with the spite of his advanced years. Children would run from him when they saw him in the park for his appearance and countenance were that of one most haggard. He had not always been this way though, his wife and two children were murdered before his eyes, and he had taken up to drinking in attempts to wash his sorrows away. For nearly eight years he drank rum more then he would water, and his moods became more and more dangerous with each bottle he drank. When he had seen that smile for the first time though, he had tried to stop drinking. Only when she did not come on Sundays did he revert to his old habits again. Somehow, when he was drunk, he could nearly picture that smile in his head… it was a thought that would delight him immensely.
Tonight was a special night though; tonight marked an anniversary of sorts, a landmark in his history of watching her. For, it was on this very day six months ago, that he had seen her smile for the first time. The very same smile that now punctured into his soul like a cold knife, cutting out the pain from his heart; that smile for which he lived for.
Sometimes, alone in his watching of her, he would fancy that the smile was smiled for him. With every fantasy that entered his mind his feelings of passion would rise up with great swells of grandeur. Oh the ecstasy, oh the pure joy which that though would bring him! Every time he thought of it, utter happiness would well up throughout his entire being, causing him to laugh as if he had never laughed before. Yet, deep inside, remorse filled him when he fancied these things, for he knew that she would never smile for him. Though the thought of it always ate away at his mind, torturing him greatly when he thought of it, tonight he did not care. Tonight he saw her as he had never seen her before. Tonight he saw that smile; that very same smile flash before him, and everything seemed pure again.
The games wore on into the night, yet she never played. It was not her way to play ball with her friends and she would remain perfectly content to watch, or to stroll around the court engaged in conversations. There were deep hedges of trees surrounding the court, the lights hardly piercing through their entangled branches. It was inside one of these hedges, on the far side of the court, where he stood: his hands in his pockets, his eyes set with a greedy desire upon her. Nearby, a little pathway led out into the parking lot and a set of nearby water fountains.
Presently, she stopped circling the court and, alone, she headed towards the water fountains. A cold shudder swept over him as she passed nearby, the breeze of her body sending chills down his spine and into his very soul. A voice within beckoned him to follow her. There were many dark pathways where he could lurk, and not be seen at all. Looking cautiously to make sure no one was watching, he slipped out from among the trees and, with soft steps began to follow her.
A strange sense of delight crept into his mind as he followed, slipping from tree to tree, and path-to-path in his secrecy. It was almost was a game he played: to stalk her when she left the court. Somehow, it made him feel almost brave; here he was following her, watching her while she never knew he did. Giddiness filled his head, and chucking as fantasies of her smile entered his mind he let his eyes wander from her and towards the playground that stood by the fountains.
Then, with a gasp, he let out a cry, recoiling even further into the darkness of the pathway. There, behind the set of swings, sat two hunched figures; their eyes set upon her as well. Yet, he could tell, their eyes were not set upon her smile… no, their eyes were set upon her flesh.
Terror gripped his heart, like an iron-fisted hand, twisting his soul freely as marinate strings. He knew what their desire was and he dreaded the mere thought of it. Fear flooded his heart with every step she took closer to her fate. Should he cry out to warn her? No, he could not; his presence would be heard and she would become afraid. In her fear, she would never set foot in the park again, and oh! How that thought tormented him, cut into him more then any thought of what would happen now ever could.
There was only one thought within his mind… but dared he to do it? Indignation, the hot war-fires of the soul, burned deep within his bowels. How dare those two men come here and mean to destroy what beauty he wished to have found in life? How dare they come with such vile intentions which, were they to be carried out, would cause her never to smile again. Indignation turned to anger, anger to bitter wrath and, with a great cry, he leapt forward from his hiding a bitter hatred burning within his eyes. His eyes were not set upon her but upon those two, those wicked two that had now stood ready to do their deed.
They sat their stupefied, watching while, with every passing moment, he came closer and closer to where they stood, his fingers clenched into fists of rage. She stood there too, equally as stupefied. She had not seen the two men that had stood in shadows, ready to rape her, and yet, this stranger was charging towards them in an attempt to protect her. Mouth held open, to shocked and afraid to scream, she watched as he neared them.
Then a shot rang out, and a splash of blood flew from him. One of the two had lifted a gun and shot at him, now a hole lay in his side as he bled upon the ground. The two were nowhere to be seen; they had fled into the darkness of the night, dropping the weapon in their haste.
Slowly, shaking, she went over towards his side, a look of fear covering her face. Yet when she saw him; his mangled body, and the splatters of blood on his face; she understood and her face changed from one of fear to that of pity. He noticed, and though pain coursed though his veins, he tried to laugh. By now, her friends had come to her side and someone had tried to call 991 but he knew inside that it wouldn’t matter. He had lost too much blood already and what would he did not know if he wanted to live? If he did, would he then be content to live knowing he’d never see her again, knowing that he would never she her face, her smile?
No, that pain would be too much for to bear, the mere thought of it sent a new fear into him: one that started at his stomach and crept over him as the shadow of death. He knew that he would not want to live if the ambulance were to come… life would then seem like death to him.Slowly, he shut his eyes for a moment and, smiling, he opened them to gaze into hers; those two eyes that pierced with a haunting kiss into his soul. She understood and, with a shrug, she let a little smile form upon her lips. Happiness, greater then bliss itself, flooded over him, washing away every fear that he had ever felt within his life. The far off sirens of the ambulance were heard, coming closer with their mournful wail but it did not matter to him, life now felt complete. With a sigh, he shut his eyes and let life drain from him. Darkness, thick and oppressing, filled his mind as he slipped from all consciousness. Yet, in the darkness, he still saw those two lips formed into that smile. Inside he knew that smile, that one perfect, angelic smile, was truly made for him.
posted by thisisme | 9:54 PM
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